Observing Lent with Kids: Age-Appropriate Practices for Fasting, Sacrifice, and Journey to the Cross

Understanding Lent: More Than Giving Up Chocolate

Lent—the 40-day period before Easter (not counting Sundays)—offers families a countercultural invitation: slow down, reflect, repent, and prepare your hearts to celebrate Jesus's resurrection. In a world that constantly pursues more, Lent asks us to embrace less. In a culture that avoids discomfort, Lent invites us into sacrifice. In an age of distraction, Lent calls us to focus.

For children and teens, Lent provides formative practice in spiritual disciplines—fasting, prayer, self-denial, and focused attention on God. These aren't arbitrary religious rules; they're practices that reshape our hearts, align our priorities, and prepare us to receive the joy of resurrection morning with greater depth and appreciation.

Why Observe Lent with Children?

Some Christian traditions don't emphasize Lent, while others make it central to their annual rhythm. Regardless of your background, observing Lent with children offers powerful benefits:

• •Teaches Delayed Gratification: In an instant-gratification culture, practicing self-denial builds character
• •Develops Spiritual Disciplines: Children learn that following Jesus sometimes requires sacrifice
• •Deepens Easter Appreciation: The joy of resurrection is sweeter after walking through the somber journey to the cross
• •Creates Space for God: Removing distractions creates room for spiritual growth
• •Builds Empathy: Experiencing small sacrifices helps children understand Jesus's ultimate sacrifice
• •Establishes Rhythm: The church calendar provides structure for spiritual formation

The Lenten Timeline: Key Dates and Meanings

Ash Wednesday

Lent begins on Ash Wednesday, 46 days before Easter (40 days not counting Sundays).

• •Significance: A day of repentance and reflection on mortality
• •Scripture: "Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return" (Genesis 3:19)
• •Practice: Many churches offer Ash Wednesday services where ashes are placed on foreheads in the shape of a cross
• •For Families: Discuss what repentance means; begin Lenten fasts or practices

The 40 Days

The 40 days mirror Jesus's 40 days of fasting in the wilderness (Matthew 4:1-11), as well as other biblical 40-day periods (Noah's flood, Moses on Mount Sinai, Israel's wilderness wandering).

Sundays During Lent

Sundays are not counted in the 40 days and are considered "mini-Easters"—feast days even during the Lenten fast. Some families relax their Lenten disciplines on Sundays.

Holy Week

The final week of Lent (Palm Sunday through Easter Saturday) deserves special attention and will be covered in detail later in this article.

Age-Appropriate Lenten Fasting

Biblical fasting involves abstaining from food for spiritual purposes. However, with children, we must approach fasting wisely, considering developmental stages, health needs, and spiritual capacity.

Important Notes About Fasting with Children

• •Never Restrict Nutrition: Growing children need adequate calories and nutrition
• •Medical Considerations: Children with diabetes, eating disorders, or other health conditions should not fast from food
• •Focus on Motive: The goal is spiritual growth, not performance or showing off
• •Teach the "Why": Help children understand that fasting isn't about earning God's favor but creating space to focus on Him

Elementary Age (Ages 5-11): Modified Fasting

At this age, avoid traditional food fasts. Instead, practice "fasting" from non-essentials:

#### Screen Time Fast

• •Eliminate or significantly reduce TV, tablets, and video games during Lent
• •Replace screen time with Bible reading, prayer, or service activities
• •Discuss how screens distract us from God
• •Notice together what you gain when you remove screens

#### Treat Fast

• •Give up desserts, candy, or special treats (not meals or nutrition)
• •Each time they want the treat, pray instead
• •Consider donating money saved to a charity
• •Discuss how Jesus gave up far more for us

#### Toy/Entertainment Fast

• •Box up favorite toys for the 40 days
• •Skip amusement parks, movies, or entertainment outings
• •Use the time and money saved for family devotions or service
• •Reflect on contentment and gratitude

#### Complaint Fast

• •Practice going without complaining, whining, or grumbling
• •When tempted to complain, say something grateful instead
• •Keep a gratitude journal throughout Lent
• •Discuss Philippians 2:14-15

Preteens (Ages 11-13): Introducing Traditional Fasting

Preteens can begin learning traditional fasting practices with guidance:

#### One-Meal Fast

• •Skip one meal per week (breakfast or lunch, not dinner)
• •Use the time for prayer and Bible reading
• •Ensure they eat healthy meals before and after
• •Discuss how physical hunger reminds us to hunger for God
• •Always have parent permission and supervision

#### Specific Food Fast

• •Give up specific foods or food groups (soda, fast food, snacks)
• •Choose something they genuinely enjoy and will miss
• •Donate saved money to missions or hunger relief
• •Connect the sacrifice to Jesus's sacrifice

#### Technology Fast

• •Give up smartphones, social media, or gaming for 40 days
• •Keep devices in a central location during Lent
• •Use freed time for spiritual practices
• •Reflect on what they learned afterward

Teens (Ages 13-18): Deeper Spiritual Disciplines

Teenagers can engage in more mature fasting practices:

#### Traditional Fasting

• •Consider fasting one day per week (with parent permission)
• •Practice various fast types: water only, one meal, sunrise to sunset
• •Never fast if health conditions contraindicate it
• •Always maintain hydration
• •Use hunger pangs as prayer prompts
• •Study biblical examples of fasting

#### Digital/Social Media Fast

• •Delete social media apps for 40 days
• •Use an analog phone or limit smartphone to calls/texts only
• •Journal about the experience
• •Discuss identity in Christ vs. social media validation

#### Lifestyle Fast

• •Fast from buying new clothes, accessories, or non-essentials
• •Give up eating out or coffee shop purchases
• •Live more simply to identify with those who have less
• •Donate saved money to worthy causes

Adding Practices: What to Do During Lent

Lent isn't just about giving up—it's also about adding spiritual practices that draw us closer to God.

Daily Lenten Devotions

Establish a daily rhythm of Scripture reading and prayer:

#### Scripture Reading Plan

Consider reading through one or more Gospels during Lent:

• •Weeks 1-2: Gospel of Mark (shortest Gospel, action-packed)
• •Weeks 3-4: Gospel of Luke (emphasizes Jesus's compassion)
• •Weeks 5-6: Passion narratives from all four Gospels

Or focus on Isaiah's Suffering Servant passages:

• •Isaiah 42:1-9
• •Isaiah 49:1-7
• •Isaiah 50:4-9
• •Isaiah 52:13-53:12

#### Prayer Practices

• •Younger Children: Simple prayers thanking Jesus for dying for us
• •Older Children: Pray through the Lord's Prayer, one line per day
• •Teens: Practice different prayer styles (lectio divina, contemplative prayer, written prayers)

Service and Generosity

Lent is an ideal time to focus on serving others:

• •Volunteer at a food bank weekly
• •Visit nursing home residents
• •Prepare meals for families in need
• •Collect items for homeless shelter
• •Sponsor a child through a relief organization
• •Write encouragement notes to people serving in ministry

Almsgiving

Traditional Lenten practice includes giving money to the poor:

• •Create a Lenten alms box where family members deposit money saved from fasts
• •Children contribute portion of allowance
• •Research organizations together and decide where to donate
• •On Easter, send the donation in Jesus's name

Lenten Activities and Crafts

Resurrection Garden

Create a miniature garden scene depicting Jesus's tomb:

#### Materials:

• •Shallow container or tray
• •Potting soil
• •Grass seed or small plants
• •Small terra cotta pot (for tomb)
• •Flat stone (to seal tomb)
• •Three small crosses made from twigs
• •Small stones for pathway

#### Instructions:

1. 1Fill container with soil
2. 2Plant grass seed or insert small plants
3. 3Lay small pot on its side to create cave tomb
4. 4Create pathway with stones leading to tomb
5. 5Place three crosses on a hill
6. 6During Lent, keep stone rolled in front of tomb
7. 7On Easter morning, roll away the stone—the tomb is empty!

Cross-Focused Art Projects

#### Nail Cross

• •Hammer nails into wood in cross shape (adult supervision)
• •Discuss how nails pierced Jesus's hands and feet
• •Wrap with red yarn representing His blood shed for us
• •Hang as a Lenten reminder

#### Crown of Thorns

• •Form grapevine or thorny branches into crown shape
• •Discuss Jesus's suffering
• •Place near your devotional space
• •On Easter, add flowers to represent beauty from suffering

#### Purple and Black Art

• •Use traditional Lenten colors (purple for royalty/repentance, black for mourning)
• •Create abstract art expressing emotions about Jesus's sacrifice
• •Add bright colors on Easter to represent resurrection joy

Journey to the Cross Calendar

Create a visual countdown to Easter:

• •Draw a path from home to a cross on poster board
• •Mark 40 stopping points along the path
• •Each day, move a figure (representing your family) one step closer to the cross
• •At each stop, read a corresponding Scripture about Jesus's journey
• •Arrive at the cross on Good Friday
• •Move to an empty tomb on Easter

Holy Week: The Climax of Lent

The final week of Lent deserves special attention as we walk through the events leading to Jesus's crucifixion and resurrection.

Palm Sunday (Sunday Before Easter)

#### Scripture:

Matthew 21:1-11, Mark 11:1-11, Luke 19:28-44, John 12:12-19

#### Activities:

• •Make palm branches from green paper and wave them
• •March around your house or yard shouting "Hosanna!"
• •Attend church's Palm Sunday service
• •Discuss how quickly the crowd turned from praising to crucifying Jesus
• •Reflect on our own fickleness and need for steadfast faith

Monday-Wednesday of Holy Week

#### Monday: Jesus Clears the Temple

• •Read Mark 11:15-19
• •Discuss Jesus's righteous anger at injustice
• •Reflect on how we use God's house

#### Tuesday: Teachings and Warnings

• •Read Matthew 24-25 (Olivet Discourse)
• •Discuss Jesus's warnings and promises
• •Appropriate for older children/teens

#### Wednesday: Plot Against Jesus

• •Read Matthew 26:1-16
• •Discuss Judas's betrayal
• •Reflect on the cost Jesus knew He would pay

Maundy Thursday

#### Scripture:

John 13-17 (Last Supper and Jesus's prayers)

#### Family Activities:

• •Share a special meal together
• •Read the Last Supper account
• •Discuss communion/Eucharist meaning
• •For older children, consider a foot-washing ceremony
• •Pray together in your "garden of Gethsemane" (backyard or living room)
• •Attend Maundy Thursday service if your church offers one

Good Friday

#### Scripture:

Matthew 27, Mark 15, Luke 23, John 19

#### Activities by Age:

Elementary (Ages 5-11):

• •Read crucifixion account from children's Bible
• •Keep lights low or off from noon to 3 PM
• •Make a simple cross from sticks
• •Discuss that Jesus died because He loves us
• •Eat simple meals

Preteens (Ages 11-13):

• •Read full crucifixion accounts from multiple Gospels
• •Study the seven last words from the cross
• •Observe three hours of quiet (noon-3 PM)
• •Create art reflecting on Jesus's suffering
• •Attend Good Friday service

Teens (Ages 13-18):

• •Deep study of crucifixion theology
• •Read and discuss Isaiah 53
• •Consider fasting until 3 PM
• •Write reflective journal entries
• •Discuss substitutionary atonement, propitiation, justification
• •Watch "The Passion of the Christ" and discuss (for mature teens)

Holy Saturday

#### Scripture:

Matthew 27:57-66 (Burial), 1 Peter 3:18-20 (Jesus's descent)

#### Activities:

• •Discuss the in-between time—death before resurrection
• •Prepare for Easter celebration
• •Bake resurrection rolls or Easter bread
• •Set up Easter decorations
• •Attend Easter Vigil service if available

Conversation Starters for Lent

For Elementary (Ages 5-11):

• •"Why do you think Jesus was willing to die on the cross?"
• •"What does it mean that Jesus took our punishment?"
• •"How does giving something up during Lent help us think about Jesus?"
• •"If you could ask Jesus one question about His death, what would it be?"

For Preteens (Ages 11-13):

• •"How has practicing Lenten disciplines been hard? What has it taught you?"
• •"Why was it necessary for Jesus to die? Why couldn't God just forgive without the cross?"
• •"What does Jesus's willingness to suffer tell us about God's character?"
• •"How should Jesus's sacrifice change the way we live?"

For Teens (Ages 13-18):

• •"How do you reconcile a loving God with the brutality of the crucifixion?"
• •"What does penal substitutionary atonement mean, and why does it matter?"
• •"How does our culture's pursuit of comfort and ease contradict Lenten practices?"
• •"In what ways are you being called to 'take up your cross' in your life right now?"

Common Challenges in Observing Lent with Kids

"My Child Gave Up But Wants to Quit"

This is normal and actually a valuable teaching opportunity:

• •Acknowledge that self-discipline is hard
• •Discuss how Jesus endured far greater difficulty for us
• •Pray together for strength to continue
• •Consider modifying the fast to something more manageable
• •Celebrate each day they do stick with it
• •Use this to teach about God's grace when we fail

"We Forgot About It and Already Broke the Fast"

• •Extend grace—Lent is about hearts, not perfection
• •Simply start again
• •Set reminders or visual cues
• •Discuss how God's mercies are new every morning

"My Child Feels Left Out When Others Aren't Fasting"

• •Discuss Jesus's teaching about not showing off when fasting (Matthew 6:16-18)
• •Explain that not all Christians observe Lent, and that's okay
• •Frame it as special family practice, not something everyone must do
• •Help them focus on the spiritual benefits they're experiencing

"Other Family Members Won't Participate"

• •Each person can observe Lent individually
• •Don't force participation
• •Model joyful discipline rather than legalistic compliance
• •Let your own experience speak for itself

The Beautiful Purpose of Lenten Discipline

Lent isn't about earning God's favor through sacrifice—Jesus already secured that for us. Lent isn't about showing how spiritual we are—Jesus warned against that kind of pride. Lent isn't even fundamentally about giving things up.

Lent is about creating space to encounter God more deeply. It's about training our hearts to desire Jesus more than comfort, more than convenience, more than entertainment. It's about teaching our children—and reminding ourselves—that following Jesus sometimes requires sacrifice, but that sacrifice is always worth it.

When your child complains about missing their favorite show, you have an opportunity to discuss how Jesus gave up heaven for us. When your teenager struggles without their phone, you can explore together how we're often distracted from what matters most. When fasting makes you uncomfortable, you can model that pursuing God is worth temporary discomfort.

And when Easter morning finally arrives—after 40 days of intentional preparation, after walking through Holy Week's somber journey, after sitting with Good Friday's grief—the explosion of resurrection joy will be deeper, sweeter, and more meaningful than it could ever be without Lent's preparation.

This Lent, as you fast, pray, serve, and journey toward the cross with your children, remember that you're not just going through religious rituals. You're teaching them that Jesus is worth following, worth sacrifice, worth everything. You're showing them that the Christian life isn't always easy, but it's always good. And you're preparing all your hearts to celebrate the greatest miracle in history: Jesus is risen!

May your Lenten journey be one of spiritual growth, deeper understanding, and joyful anticipation of resurrection morning.